Jim Mulholland-I've been studying mental illness this past week and I'm worried.  I thought I was mentally healthy, but now I'm not so certain.  I have a lot of the symptoms I've been reading about.

Jim Mulholland-I was taught from an early age to love my enemies and to pray for those who persecuted me.  That wasn't a popular lesson for the teachers or the students.  When you have an enemy, you don't want to love them.  You want to eliminate them.  But we didn't have much choice.  Jesus commanded it.  We had to do it, whether we liked it or not.

Philip Gulley-Our nation's leaders gathered Thursday evening at the White House to rescue the nation from economic peril.  I wasn't invited, so instead went to the Olive Garden in Avon to help Gene Carter celebrate his birthday.  Then I came home and went for a walk around the block.  It was dark, and the stars were out.  I could see the Big Dipper and the North Star, Polaris, which is 430 light years away, which means I was seeing it as it was in 1578, long before the world had ever heard of sub-prime mortgages.  The future astronomer, Galileo, was 14 years old.  Galileo would grow up to inform us the Earth was not the fixed center of the universe.  For that radical heresy, the Roman Catholic Church, which considered itself and the Earth the center of the universe, placed him under house arrest, where he spent the remainder of his life writing one of his finest books, Two New Sciences, which effectively launched the field of physics.  But the light from the star Polaris predates all of that.

Philip Gulley-Last week, our neighbors had their annual hog roast and our family went, as has been our custom since we first moved to Danville.  The neighbors have a camper.  A rite of passage for the teenage boys was to spend the night of the hog roast in the camper, so this year we told Spencer he could do that.  When Spencer came home the next morning, I asked him what they'd done.  He said they talked around the campfire until midnight then did a few more things, went to sleep, then woke up around eight o'clock.  It was the phrase, “then did a few more things,” that caught my attention, because I’ve learned the activities that don't get elaborated upon are the most interesting.  I'm still trying to figure out the few more things they did.

Jim Mulholland-Sometimes I love open worship and sometimes I despise it. This past Sunday was the latter. A group of us were sitting in worship at Fairfield Meeting. Phil had greeted us at the door. People had been warm and welcoming. The sermon had been funny and insightful. It had been a pleasant morning.

Jim Mulholland-Last week, our family gathered in Michigan for the annual Mulholland reunion.  It’s a week of canoeing, swimming at the beach, playing cards, sitting around the campfire, eating too much food and reminiscing.  I've attended the reunion 43 times in my 47 years.  When I drive through the tunnel of trees leading to our cabins, it's entering a cathedral.  I get the shivers.  I feel religious.

Philip Gulley-My mother's father, Henry Quinett, was born in 1904 in Belgium, and with his family sailed on the Red Star boat line to America in 1909. They arrived at Ellis Island, where his name was changed from Henrí Quinét to Henry Quinett. Because my grandfather was never one to hurry a decision, he lived here thirty-one years before becoming a citizen in 1939. His citizenship papers are framed and hanging in my garage, above his workbench, next to his woodworking apron.

Philip Gulley-I've been thinking this week of Esau and Jacob. Some people have been thinking of Michael Phelps winning the gold in Beijing, or Bridget Sloan, our fellow Hendricks Countian, performing so ably and admirably. Some people have been thinking of the hostility between Georgia and Russia and the long history of Eastern European strife. Some people have been thinking of school and the summer winding to a close. There have been any number of things to think about this week, but I've been thinking about Esau and Jacob. That is so like a pastor. The world could be plunging into a global crisis, on the verge of World War III, and pastors would sit around and dwell upon minor Biblical characters from four thousand years ago.

Jim Mulholland-I've been preaching for twenty years now.  That means I've preached about a thousand sermons.  Over the years, I honed by skills and developed my style.  And I suspect my seminary preaching professor would not be happy with me.

Jim Mulholland-This past month, we've been examining the ways we talk about religion with ourselves, our peers, other Christians and even non-Christians.  We've looked at the obstacles and explored the benefits of discussing religion.  We've been encouraged to have these conversations rather than to fear them.  I hope you’ve found the exploration as interesting and as helpful as I have. 

Jim Mulholland-Sometimes I forget how quickly the world is changing.  This weekend, I was playing with Madeline and Olivia, my five and three year old nieces.  They'd caught a lighting bug and asked me what they should feed it.  When I said I didn't know, Madeline said, “Let's look on the internet.”

Philip Gulley-We've been thinking and talking about maturity.  Today, I want to leave us with this final thought:  Mature people are those who enhance life, not diminish it.  Or staying with our analogy—mature people know two wolves battle within them, and give careful thought to the wolf they feed.  They feed the habits and attitudes that enhance life.  They starve the habits and attitudes that diminish life.

Philip Gulley-I remember when I was about five years old and there was this girl who lived down the street from us who was overweight.  She came down to our house to play.  I became upset with her and began making fun of her size.  My father overheard me and when I came in for supper, he was waiting for me. 

Jim Mulholland-Whenever people talk about the beauty and wisdom of the Bible, I wonder if they've read the book.   I worry they've limited their reading to the 23rd Psalm and the 13th chapter of I Corinthians.  Or that they've ripped long passages out of their family Bibles.  Having read the Bible from cover to cover, I've found as much ugliness and ignorance as beauty and wisdom.

Philip Gulley-It is good to be back at Fairfield.  I was in Chicago last weekend speaking at a conference.  Took the family with me and on our way home on Sunday morning we stopped at the Navy Pier to sight-see and while there bumped into Jonathan and Rafia Chenoweth and little Rania. 

Philip Gulley-When I was a kid, back in the Stone Ages before video games and we had to provide our own entertainment, we would play a game we called What If?   The game was played by asking questions beginning with the words "What if…".   The questions were fairly predictable.  What if you won a million dollars?  What if you were the President?  What if the communists invaded us?  The winner, of course, was the person who came up with the most creative answer, which meant there was never a clearly decided upon winner, since we all voted for ourselves.

Jim Mulholland-My daughter, Victoria, was offended by my sermon two weeks ago.  I said something in that sermon that wasn't fair or true.  In talking about how we pass our theological baggage onto our children, I said, "That’s the way it is with abuse.  The abused child grows up to abuse their own children."  Victoria, who was abused by her birth parents, was upset by that assertion.  As she pointed out, it doesn't have to be that way.

Philip Gulley-Isn't the concept of time interesting?  I was trying to find out who invented the concept of time, but no one seems able to say definitively.  Some scientists believe the moon was used to calculate time as early as the Palaeothilic Era, perhaps 30,000 years ago.   We know the Sumerians, about 4,000 years ago, introduced the sexagesimal system based on the number 60. That’s why we have 60 seconds in a minute and 60 minutes in an hour.  This past February, researchers at the University of Colorado at Boulder demonstrated a new clock based on the vibrations of strontium atoms trapped in a laser grid.  This new clock loses less than one second of time every 200 million years.  That's a lot more accurate than the clock in my office with wooden gears which loses three minutes a day, whose time I adjust by taping paper clips to the pendulum.

Jim Mulholland-My brother, Matt, called me for advice last week.  He was upset and confused.  His five year old daughter, Madeline, had been the victim of child abuse and he didn't know what to do or who to tell.  Normally, you'd go to the police, but the situation was complicated.  The perpetrator was one of Madeline's uncles and confronting him might split the family.  Especially since what he'd done was neither sexually nor physically abusive.  Though Madeline was clearly traumatized, many would think what happened was harmless or even cute.

Philip Gulley-It's good to be back at meeting.  I was in Punxsutawney, Pennsylvania last Sunday to spend time with Presbyterians.  And while there, met Phil, the weather-predicting groundhog, who came to my speech, took one good look at me, and went back into his cage for six weeks.

Philip Gulley-We took the boys to Florida last week for spring vacation.  Our previous spring breaks were spent in the cold in Indiana cleaning the house, so the boys would look forward to returning to school.  But this year we set aside our traditional Hoosier conventions and drove our pale Quaker bodies south to the beach.  The condo we stayed in faced the beach and had recently been renovated after a storm and tidal waves had filled it with water and sand.  The ocean has many wonderful attributes, but self-regulation and restraint are not among them, so you could never quite tell what the waves would do.  I watched people walk along the beach trying not to get wet, but then a big wave would lap in, and the people would skitter away like little Groucho Marx birds.

JIm Mulholland-When I was twelve years old, I took a trip to Texas with my father.  As part of that trip, we walked across the bridge over the Rio Grande at El Paso and visited Juarez, Mexico.  This was my first time I'd ever been outside of the United States and I was really excited.  I was also surprised. 

Philip Gulley-When I was a kid I loved storms. We lived in a big, sturdy house; I felt very secure and like most children had no concept of mortality.  One of my most vivid memories is of April 3, 1974 when 148 tornadoes swept across the Midwest.  The tornadoes missed Danville, but of course we didn't know that then, and so my parents had us go to the basement and crouch in the coal room behind the furnace.  But I remember my brother Doug and I escaping and running upstairs to look out the parlor windows to the west, hoping to see a tornado, and being so disappointed when it didn't come. 

Philip Gulley-I received a letter in the mail last week from a man in the South who'd read one of the Harmony books and wrote to tell me I wasn't fit to be a minister.  I'm not quite sure how he was able to judge my suitability for ministry by reading a work of comic fiction, but that's what he did, and with much enthusiasm.  Most of the sentences were underlined, there were lots of exclamation points, and the Bible verses he cited were in bold print.  He quoted from the letter of James in the New Testament. "Let not many of you become teachers, for you know that we who teach shall be judged with greater strictness."  (James 3:1)

Jim Mulholland-Last weekend, several of us attended a workshop at Western Yearly Meeting entitled "Seeking Common Ground."  This gathering encouraged conservative and liberal Friends to talk and listen to each other.  Though a majority of the day was spent in small group discussion, the event began with four speakers talking about their understanding of Jesus and the Church.  Two were liberal and two were conservative.

Jim Mulholland-Last Sunday, as Angie and I drove home after worship, we discussed the sermon.  That's not unusual.  I often ask for her feedback.  Even though I've preached hundreds of sermons, I always worry I may not have communicated well.  Last Sunday, I worried that I given some of you the impression that I thought Irvington wasn't an inclusive community.

Philip Gulley-Several months ago, I flew down to Texas to give a talk.  I ate supper on the airplane—a half ounce of pretzels and a cup of water—but was still hungry so ate a few peanuts I'd found in the seat cushions.  It was late by the time I got to the hotel and the restaurant was closed.  I didn't have a car, so I couldn't drive anywhere.  My hotel room had a minibar in it.  I looked in there for something to eat, but it was crazy expensive—six dollars for a package of cheese and crackers.   Five dollar candy bars.   It was outrageous.  They had a lemon scented moist towellete in there for fifty cents.  I thought of buying that and sucking the lemon out. 

Philip Gulley-Back about nine years ago, I got a call one Monday morning around seven o'clock.  It was my mother, phoning to tell me my father had had a heart attack in the middle of the night, that they were at the hospital in Danville, but were getting ready to transfer him in an ambulance up to St. Vincent's.  "But don’t worry," she said.

Jim Mulholland-Several years ago, when Western Yearly Meeting was debating the issue of same sex marriage, one rural Quaker meeting was especially adamant that homosexuality was a sin and homosexuals should not be tolerated in the Society of Friends.  They felt this so strongly they wrote a letter stating their position.

Philip Gulley-When I was about 18, I began operating computers at Duke Energy, then called Public Service Indiana. I did that for five years, making catastrophic mistakes which cost the company millions of dollars before they wised up and put me on the lawn mowing crew. I lacked the proper temperament for working on computers, because I'd discuss theology with my Baptist co-worker, get agitated, hit the wrong button, wiping out thousands of man-hours of work and causing blackouts across the Midwest.

Philip Gulley-This past spring I was speaking at a conference sponsored by another denomination.  They had read the grace books and had invited me to come to their conference and speak on the topic of universalism.  I always agree to do things like that because it’s a speech I've already written.  It’s like picking low fruit.  But it's also fun because I get to meet new people and make new friends.  So I went to Dallas and talked about how our religious differences, while interesting, have the potential to cause much hostility and division if we're not careful. 

Jim Mulholland-This past month, we've been exploring non-violent communication – a style of communication designed to get us in touch with our feelings and needs and help us communicate with compassion rather than judgment.  We've talked about observing rather than judging, identifying our feelings, and expressing our needs.  We've discovered how difficult these tasks can be. 

Jim Mulholland-When Angie and I first met, one of my chief attractions to her was her ability to read minds.  It was incredible.  Whenever I would think about her, she would call.  When I was missing her, she'd send a note.  When we were together, she knew what I needed even before I asked.  She could read my mind.

Philip Gulley-I've been thinking lately about the questions Jesus asked.  My friend Jim just finished preaching a sermon series on that very topic and is thinking of writing a book about the questions Jesus asked.  I didn't read his sermons, because I knew I wanted to consider those questions myself and didn't want my heresy to be confused by his orthodoxy.  But he sent me his sermons to read, then phoned to ask if I thought they'd make a good book.  Of course, I felt guilty because I hadn't read the sermons, but I said, "You bet," then changed the subject.  I don"t mind Jesus' questions, but Jim's questions can put me on the spot.

Phil Gulley-Well, it is good to see you.  Indeed, it is good to see anyone.  I ushered in the new year with a nasty case of bronchitis.  Woke up December 30th to the sound of the trumpet blast, then saw, out of the corner of my eye, the Angel of Death holding a sign with my name on it, like at the airport when someone you’ve never met is picking you up.  But at the last moment, just before I could say, "I think you're looking for me…" his cell phone rang and God told him to pick up someone else. 

Jim Mulholland-When my daughter Nicole was a teenager, she would often come into my office when I was working at my desk, wrap her arms around my neck, and whisper in my ear, "You are the best daddy in the whole world." As much as any father loves to hear those words, I soon learned to be suspicious. There was often a motive other than praise behind her sudden affection. Eventually, it became a game. She would say, "You are the best daddy in the whole world" and I would reply, "What do you want?"

Jim Mulholland-My parents lied to me.  I'm certain they had the best of intentions.  Most parents do.  But often parents tell their children what they wish was the case rather than what is true. 

Philip Gulley-One of the interesting things about growing up is getting to see how the kids you hung out with when you were little turned out.  There were some kids who, when I was growing up, I thought to myself, "Well, they'll end up in jail."  They maybe thought the same thing about me.   But they grew into really neat, responsible, caring adults.  Then there were people you thought were going to be the President of the United States, but they peaked early and weren't all that successful.  They have difficulty in their relationships, they're highly reactive and consequently make poor choices, or they are crippled by one addiction or another.  And it's always surprising because they showed such promise and potential when they were young.

Philip Gulley- When I was about ten years old, a family moved in down the street from us. They had five feral children, kids who weren't raised, they just kind of grew up. One of the kids was particularly mean, just tough as old leather.  I'd walk by their home every morning and afternoon and hardly a day passed that that kid wouldn't see me coming down the sidewalk, fly out their front door, and come after me.  I'd take off running, but I was never fast enough, and that kid would tackle me and start pounding on me, just knocking me down to dust.  It was like that every day for months, that kid just beating the thunder out of me.  Boy, she was tough. 

Jim Mulholland-You know what I hate. I hate it when my wife, Angie, does something irritating, something that isn't quite right, and when I point it out, she says, "Someone must have had a bad day."

Phil Gulley-I've been thinking this week of Ray Stewart, who passed away on January 20, 2005, nearly three years ago, but who I think about nearly every day.  Ray was a blink away from turning 90 when he died, so we weren't close in age, but very near in spirit, and I miss him a great deal.  Like me, he had a talent for upsetting Quakers of a certain stripe—the same people were always mad at both of us—and Ray could always be counted upon for advice and support.  I would phone him to lament some difficulty I was having, and a half hour later he would be at our back door, saying, "Philip, my boy, let’s talk."

Philip Gulley-Last week in Chat Room, the subject of motivational posters came up.  I can't remember how the topic came up, but it was an interesting discussion.  There's a certain kind of motivational poster you've probably all seen. show a pretty scene, then one word, followed by a definition.  They're made by a company called Successories. This past year, instead of getting a raise, a friend of mine was given a Successories motivational poster to hang in his office.  It shows a bridge crossing a stream, has the It'll word Collaborate in big letters, followed by the saying, "Meeting people halfway is the most significant trip we can take.  We don't work for each other; we work with each other."  My friend hates that poster.  He asked his boss, "Since I don't work for you, but with you, how come you got a raise and I didn't?"

Philip Gulley-We had family Thanksgiving at our house this past Thursday, then on Friday went to Paoli for the Apple Family Thanksgiving, which we eat at a restaurant, Joan's mother, Ruby, being too old to cook, but still too much of a mother to let her daughters cook, so we go to a restaurant and it works out pretty well.   The restaurants of Orange County, Indiana do not serve good food, but they do give you a lot of it, adhering to what I call the Golden Corral theory of dining—that people don’t mind if the food is bad, so long as there is a lot of it.   

JIm-Mulholland-Angie and I had wonderful time visiting New Zealand. We spent the first few days with my sister and her family – sightseeing, playing games, catching up. Then we rented a car and went exploring. We discovered a beautiful land of rolling green hills, towering snow capped mountains, deep blue lakes, thundering waterfalls, and rocky seashore.

Jim Mulholland-Last week, in my sermon, I shared the story of my final years in the United Methodist Church, of how my theology began to change even though my preaching remained the same. I talked about the misery of that and the captivity it created. I told of my decision to resign. This week, I realized I didn't tell you the whole story.